dadjoke

DAD: What do you call a fake noodle? Dad: An Impasta. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes, every Sunday

DAD: He'd like to give you a "get well soon" shout-out, but he's a little horse. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best

Why did the crab never share? Because he's shellfish. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes, every Sunday

DAD, TO A SINGER: "Don’t forget a bucket." SINGER: "Why?" DAD: "To carry your tune." Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make

You heard of that new band 1023MB? They're good but they haven't got a gig yet. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the

Where did the college-aged vampire like to shop? Forever 21. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes, every

What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes,

What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school? Bison. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the

Why wasn't the woman happy with the velcro she bought? It was a total ripoff. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the

What does an angry pepper do? It gets jalapeño your face. Dad Joke will be away on vacation for the next three days Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also

What does a zombie vegetarian eat? “GRRRAAAAAIIIINNNNS!” Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes, every Sunday

When you ask a dad if they got a haircut: "No, I got them all cut!" Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the pee is silent. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the

What do you call a lonely cheese? Provolone. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes, every Sunday and Thursday.

Can February March? No, but April May! Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes, every Sunday and Thursday.

Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes, every Sunday and Thursday. These winners will be selected from the

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea! Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes, every Sunday and Thursday.

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting the best memes,

I was interrogated over the theft of a cheese toastie. Man, they really grilled me. Each Day the @DadJoke Account will select the best user generated meme. We will also make a bi-weekly post highlighting