Most people want to be happy. But they also want to be successful. And, while each person might have an individualized definition of just what each of those things means to them specifically, the overall desire to lead a life that’s free of stress, worry, anxiety and fear, while being replete with happiness and success, is constant.
Want to be happier? Begin by being good to yourself. That may sound self-evident, but too many people skip this step and try to make themselves happy by chasing ever-higher goals, or holding themselves to ever-greater standards of perfection.
Ironically, being good to yourself instead will bring you closer to achieving those lofty ambitions.
"The more you value yourself, especially at work, the more you build confidence,"
"When you love yourself, you understand that saying no to something you don't want to do is an act of kindness, and you don't walk around with negative feelings toward the person who asked you to do something you didn't want to do," Schwartz says.
Accept yourself as you are right now.
For starters, that means accepting the body that you have today. "Body image is a big stumbling block, and so is age,". "When you love yourself, you try to be the best person you can be in the body that you have, and that's as much as you can do."
Self-acceptance also means accepting your income and success level as they are. "It's OK not to be making a certain amount by the time you get to a certain age,". "Entrepreneurs get a lot of criticism when people say, 'Why are you wasting your time doing that?' or 'You're not successful enough!'"
Eliminate toxic people in your life and workplace.
This may be easier said than done, but avoid tying yourself to clients, business partners, investors, or employees who make you unhappy. It's obviously harder to take the same approach with family members, but Schwartz says there's no reason to put up with people saying or doing things that are unkind. "If people say mean things to me, I let them know if they talk to me like that I'm going to walk away or hang up the phone.
Low self-esteem
If you grew up hearing that whatever you did wasn’t good enough, how are you supposed to grow into an adult with a positive self-image? If you were criticized no matter what you did or how hard you tried, it becomes difficult to feel confident and comfortable in your own skin later. The shame forced on you for perpetually "failing" can feel blindingly painful.
Overcome your obstacles.
If achieving goals were easy, everyone would do it quickly and without difficulty. Even if your vision is clear and you can articulate a detailed destiny, there are always obstacles in the path. It's the joy and journey of clearing those obstacles that makes life rich, and helps people feel truly accomplished when they finally reach their pinnacle of success.
.External Obstacles--These are obstacles outside of your control such as the economy, natural disasters, physical limitations, and the political climate.
. Internal Obstacles--These obstacles are generally one-time issues but you have direct control over them, such as debt, cash flow, time availability, needed skills or talent.
.Habitual Obstacles--These obstacles reflect how people get in their own way. They can only be removed with behavioral change.
Focus on success and a happy life.
What are we focused on in life? What do we want the most? And what are the reasons for focusing on and wanting those things? When we focus on what we don’t have, we live in a state of lack. We realize just how much we’re missing out on or how much we lack the resources to do the things that we really want.
When we talk about happiness and success, we’re talking about two different things. What makes a person feel happy and what makes a person feel successful don’t always coincide with one another. But sometimes they do. The thing about happiness and success is that, in order to achieve either of them.
Consider what will make you happy, and write it down. Consider what will make you feel successful, and right it down. This is a prerequisite for achieving either. Without writing it down, they’ll remain in the abstract. And goals that remain in the abstract are always unattainable. So, put some definition behind them both.
Happiness and success will never come until we’re completely grateful for what we have. Even if we think that all we have are problems, we have to be grateful for them. Because, if we were to throw our problems into the ring with those of others from around the world, I can assure you that we would take our problems back.
There’s an inherent appreciation for life that sets in when we’re present. It doesn’t mean that we get to ignore our problems. Problems are a sign of life. And we will always have problems. If you’re thinking that you’ll be happy or achieve success when your problems will disappear, think again. We will never be problem free. Ever.
References
https://www.inc.com/minda-zetlin/11-simple-ways-to-make-yourself-happy-every-day.html
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/me-we/201312/10-sources-low-self-esteem
https://www.inc.com/kevin-daum/4-tips-for-overcoming-obstacles.html
https://www.wanderlustworker.com/7-keys-to-happiness-and-success-in-life/