My message today is this: you can do hard things. You can throw light into the darkest corners of your closet. You can stand up to struggle on oak tree legs.
My approach to self- betterment has always been unconditional love. I have worked to separate myself from society's sandpaper critiques and my own destructive internal monologue. I still appreciate these things, don't get me wrong. What's new is this: I am welcoming the growing pains of challenge more and more. I used to avoid struggle, and believed that those who sought it out had twisted priorities. Now, I join them in doing so. There is something downright exhilarating about it. Maybe because it provides visceral validation that we are being changed by our circumstances.
I'll share an example. I have orthorexia and a touch (or more) of exercise fixation. For years, my response to this was a militaristic workout regime. I did the exact same routine for six years because I trusted it to keep me slender and was terrified of the alternative. Any alternative. In other words, I kicked off my shoes and got real comfortable with an obsessive lifestyle. I wanted to become stronger, grow some muscles, do 30 day yoga challenges... but I held back. I didn't believe that I could handle the hardship of change.
Until a month ago, when I decided to switch everything up. I carefully deconstructed each of the pillars of my routine. As a result, I have progressed more in the last 30 days than in the last 3 years. New results are only possible with new methods. We must change one side of the equation to change the other. The good news is this: human beings crave adventure and novelty and surprise. We thrive through these circumstances. Why not use this to our advantage, to cultivate self- betterment on scales unimaginable?
This is not to say that our lives have to be unbearable in order for us to move forward. We are here to enjoy the ride as much as anything else. However, if you want things to be different, change them. Expect it to be uncomfortable. If you have blind spots and weaknesses (we all do), lean into them. Let's cease to shy away from struggle. We say, "it was an experience I grew from" when we speak of it in past tense. Therefore, struggle becomes experience via cognitive processing and time. Experience becomes wisdom and intuition and wizardry- the things of our wildest dreams.
So I invite you to join me, in my quest to do hard things and fall in love with the process.