It has been two days now that I have been thinking about this question posted by @hiveph for their March Blogging Contest:
Where should women find strength?
No matter how I think about it, I cannot think of things exclusive to women. Then, it hit me. Maybe it is sexist to assume that we, women, should find strength in things exclusive to us. It is also absurd to tell men to find strength in things considered solely for them. As I was making a list of my answers, I realized that women should find strength in these things not because we are women, but because we are human. Back to the question: Where should we, women, find strength?
Purpose
One of my closest friends, IC (not her real name), told me that working in a public school stresses her, but it is not the teaching that is giving her a difficult time. It is the toxic workplace. When I asked her if she wanted to quit, she said no. She found a way to shift her attention from the toxicity and focus on the necessity of her service. She told me her students need somebody who is patient in teaching them, and she sees her purpose in that. That is what is keeping her strong in the industry.
What is our purpose? Is it to provide students the opportunity of learning? Is it making people aware of the importance of financial literacy? Is it helping the minority have their voices heard? Healing the sick? Spreading God's word? Whatever it is that gives meaning to our lives, we should find strength in it. Purpose creates our importance in society. If you say you do not know your purpose yet, I suggest you choose one for yourself. Do not wait for it to come to you. Do not worry. You can change it later on in life when you have a better idea of what you want.
Dreams
During my college days, one of my classmates, Tess (not her real name), has been very vocal about her dreams. Her sharing usually happened whenever we discussed family. She grew up in an abusive environment and wanted an entirely different future for herself and her soon-to-be family. Her goals have been her compass. Now, she is working her dream job (it is not teaching), has her dream house, and she and her husband are expecting their first child. Years ago, she was just talking about all of it. Now, she's starting to live her dreams. She endured, knowing she would reach her goals someday.
I see purpose as what you want others to achieve through you. On the other hand, I see dreams as what you want to achieve for yourself. They do not have to be the same thing, but the same with purpose, dreams provide an essential ingredient for our existence. When we get tired of doing the hard work, we gain strength by thinking about what good will it do for us. Dreams are there to motivate us. More so, it helps to keep us strong, disciplined, and intentional in our actions.
Think about your dream. If it does not excite or scare you, perhaps you should make a bigger one.
Other People
The first two answers are our inner sources of strength, but the last is an external one--- other people. We do not live only for ourselves, just like how a flower does not produce nectar for it to eat. We know we exist because we exist with and in others. We are strong because someone needs our strength.
I cannot think of a better example other than my mother. She has shown me how we, as her family, keep her strong. She is happier when we are happy, and more hurt when we are hurt. She has shown how resilient she can be for each of her children. She is the strongest woman I know.
Who are your most valued people? Maybe as you are reading this, they flash into your mind - your parents' voices, your child’s laughter, your spouse's sleeping face, your friend's latest joke, God’s love… or your parents' tears, your child’s isolation, your spouse’s job rejection, your friends latest heartbreak, God’s wrath. We find strength in other people because we want to be strong to protect their good experiences, happiness, and future, and avoid adversities (or at least be with them in these dark trying times).
Every day different challenges bump our way and shake us. It is not uncommon to feel weak even for the simplest of things. However, reminding ourselves of our purpose, dreams, and love for and from other people pushes us ahead of our journey with a strong platform to walk on.
We are women. We are humans. We are strong.
Thanks for reading!
Let me invite you to participate in @hiveph March Blogging Contest where you can answer any of the six questions posted dedicated to celebrate International Women's Month. Everyone can join even non-Filipinos!
See you there!