I stared at my wife from across the dinner table, no longer able to contain the question that had been eating away at me for weeks.
"Are you having an affair?"
Michelle froze, fork hovering halfway between her plate and mouth. The clatter of silverware and chatter from other patrons seemed to fade into the background as I awaited her response.
"What? No, of course not!" She looked almost amused by the accusation. Almost.
I studied her face, searching for even the slightest twitch of dishonesty. But she appeared sincere, her gentle brown eyes meeting my gaze head-on.
"It's just...you've been acting strange lately," I pressed on. "All those late nights at the office. The weekend trips for 'conferences' and 'work retreats.' It feels like you're hiding something."
Michelle set her fork down, shaking her head. "Matt, you know I've been up for that big promotion. I told you months ago it would require extra time and travel. But I swear there's no affair." She reached across to squeeze my hand. "You're the only one for me."
I wanted to believe her. But doubt still nagged at me, poisoning the certainty I once felt in our marriage.
"Prove it then," I heard myself blurt out. "No more vague excuses. I want concrete proof you're telling the truth about where you really go."
Michelle withdrew her hand, hurt flashing across her face. But she saw the rigid set of my jaw and knew I wouldn't back down.
"Okay fine," she relented with a sigh. Opening her purse, she rifled around for a moment before placing a business card on the table. "Here. This is my boss, Frank. You can call and confirm I was at the conference in Baltimore last weekend."
I picked up the card, scrutinizing it. "And what about all these evening 'meetings?'"
Rolling her eyes, Michelle took out her phone and queued up her calendar, sliding it over for my inspection. It was filled with work appointments coinciding with her many late nights.
My shoulders sagged as I realized she could account for nearly every instance that had raised my suspicions. Maybe she really was telling the truth. I felt a twinge of shame at having doubted her.
Michelle gently reclaimed her phone, regarding me with compassion instead of bitterness over my accusations.
"Matt, I would never cheat on you," she reiterated. "I thought after five years of marriage you would know that. So where is all this coming from?"
I worried the edge of my napkin, struggling to voice feelings I couldn't fully explain. "I don't know...we've just felt distant lately. You're gone more, we barely talk like we used to..." I rubbed at the tension gathering between my eyes. "I guess with all the changes, part of me is afraid I'm losing you. That someone else is moving in to fill the space we've put between us."
Understanding dawned on Michelle's face. She reached for me again. This time I didn't pull away.
"I know my work schedule has been crazy. But never doubt my commitment to you, to us." Her thumb traced gentle circles over my wrist. "I'll try to do better about being present even when I'm overwhelmed. And you have to promise to talk to me when you feel this way instead of bottling it up. Deal?"
My lips quirked into a half smile. "Deal."
Maybe she was rightᅳmy fears said more about our lack of communication than any deception on her part. As Michelle launched into a comical account of her boss's antics at the conference, the tight bands that had constricted my chest over weeks of suspicion finally loosened.
I still had more questions than answers about some things. But her willingness to provide concrete evidence rather than vague excuses spoke volumes. For now, that was enough truth for me.