[lil art made by me]
Diddy Freed
Playanomics, an upcoming rapper decided he was going to DM Diddy and give up his A-hole for the fame and money we all heard Diddy was offering.
Diddy's alternative account messaged him and provided a location.
When he got to the location there were 21 other upcoming male artists who had been recruited the same way.
They all got gagged, and tied in a bent-over position. Then a 16-inch-wielding gay gorilla on viagra was unleashed to do the deed on them.
The alternative account wasn't Diddy's, but a psychopath FBI agent in charge of monitoring Diddy's DMs.
Day 9
Diddy Jailed
One morning he saw a guard tampering with the cameras around, and he knew they'd come for him tonight.
It was too difficult to stay awake, so he realized his food had been spiked.
He struggled under the influence to stay awake, the best he could get was sleep paralysis which he fought endlessly to wake from.
In the next room, four guards had a long brutal battle to kill the inmate therein because the spiked food meant for the inmate had been switched by error.
Day 8
Sniper
The AI system that took over the job of snipers had a bug and there was a need for a human shooter to take down the leader of an Islamic terrorist sect.
Boom!
The head of the leader was blown into smithereens!
Boom! The head of a random person in the crowd. Then another, and another.
McBride's job was done with the first head but he wasn't going to stop. Tears of joy rolled down his cheeks as he kept shooting. He had missed this.
Day 7
Funny Walk
He dropped dead, blood gushing out.
The female was not a Homo sapien. She was Homo Neanderthalensis.
The couple other human species (Ergaster, Rhodesiensis, Erectus, etc) shared the world with and looked like Homo sapiens, that's why this mistake was rampant.
There was one difference, though, they all moved/walked slightly different.
Millions of Homo sapien men met their end this way that's why the part of us that gets turned off by people who walk funny was evolved.
Day 6
The Invisibility Suit
"Yes!"
He'd stolen a lot of money using this invisibility suit but this excitement was different.
He followed a huge-titted woman into a chamber. Soon as she got in she closed the lid and it held him in place painfully because half of his hand was still outside.
Then he realized, this was the woman on the poster. She filled the chamber with water and sat to practice her breath-hold.
Greg couldn't hold his breath as long as the pro.
Day 5
HYUNDAI
Oscar, an American, worked at a junkyard but was just finding this out to his amusement.
Then the thought hit him, he ran to the pieces of Honda cars they had sent through the shredding machine last week. Luckily they hadn't been moved.
He stood there, petrified!
There were grinded pieces of human flesh and bones in it. The British drug dealers he had tried to smuggle through the Canadian border by telling them to hide in any of the Hyundai.
Day 4
The Don's Love
Hungry rats inhabited this room. You're chained up and injected with nutrients every day so you don't die of hunger.
You're to die from the rats eating you bit by bit, instead.
Blaise was to be sent there but because the Don loved him, Blaise was granted a request. The request that his hands not be chained so he could fight the rats.
To his surprise, the Don agreed!
But when the rats came, the Don had covered them in steel vests, Blaise's blows could not harm them.
Day 3
A Night of Fun
He was panic-stricken!
What should he do? He couldn't call the police because he could go to jail due to all the drugs and the circumstances. He also could not tell anyone.
So he took her body to the woods nearby and dug an extra deep grave, because there were a lot of dogs in the area.
The next day, in the afternoon, Holly woke up from the drug-induced blackout. It was impossible to dig herself out.
Day 2
Hammer Curl
Yeah, I pinned an old friend to the wall and aimed a hammer meant to scare him, not to hit him, but to hit the wall by the right side of his head, so I can laugh and he'll join me realizing I was just kidding.
He shifted his head to the side of the wall I was aiming at.
Day 1
Trump
Now he's relaunching The Art of the Deal.
At the book signing a skinny sickly pale green-eyed 5 year old boy walked to his desk. Trump grinned.
"I've only come to give you this piece of paper, it's about the two failed attempts on your life", the boy said.
"It's only the greatest presidents they try to kill, they've tried to kill me twice, so what does that tell you, eh?"
The boy, still expressionless, walked away.
Trump looked at the paper, it read:
"Third time's a charm"
The End
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