It is good to be self-focused and keep one's self at priority, and that's how it should be, but at the same time, we must not forget that we live in a world with many people around us. These people are our family and friends also who care for us and love us, and this cannot be neglected. Some people are so self-absorbed and self-focused that they cannot think beyond them. All the time it is about them.
I am in a little hurtful situation these days, a person who is very very dear to me behaves like as if does not care for me at all. Sometimes I feel have I wasted all my energy and emotions after this person, when this person does not have any care or concern for me. How does one feel when you go all out for someone and the opposite person gives a very cold shoulder. Probably it's my fault to build expectations, but then when someone is dear to you, these emotions come naturally, right?
I keep thinking, how can someone be so self-absorbed that they cannot see and feel what the opposite person feels and how hurt they are. That's true that life does not stop for anyone and irrespective of anyone's presence or absence in life it does go on. I will go to all lengths to save a relationship, but when the person on the other side has no inclination then it is really not worth it for me also to put my energy in maintaining it. It's difficult to come to these terms but then it's better for me to understand as soon as possible.
I am a person who too believes that self comes first, but that does not mean that I will not consider the opposite person's feelings and emotions that they would be feeling for me and disrespect that. Mindfulness is also important along with self-care. There's a difference between self-care and being selfish. One cannot be self-absorbed and then expect other people around them to take care of them. Probably sometimes you have to be selfish, but if one does that all the time, what do you say. This has been going on for some time, but last night I was feeling very disturbed. These thoughts would just not stop, and it brings a lot of disappointment and pain. Sometimes I wish that I should tell the person, how I feel, but then I have done that in past as well, and there has not been much of a change so I am feeling now worthless to do these conversations again and again.
You share your feelings with someone who will understand, but if that person does not understand and keeps justifying their behavior with their own logic then I personally believe that it's not worth to put more energy into it. Some people are too practical in life like this person and some are too emotional. I am not the very emotional one. I like to balance and I cannot tilt on one side completely, hence the practicality of this person without any heart in matters does not suit me and it does make me feel sad.
I have been feeling too heavy on my heart and hence I just wanted to share my feelings today, and as I always say writing is my best tool to release, so that's what I am doing today. For whoever reads my blog today, thanx for hearing me out. It's not always very easy to share our burden but it is necessary. I guess to an extent it's also the effect of the retrograde, planetary shifts and the eclipse which is around the corner. I need to keep reminding myself to stay calm and let this pass.
Thank you for visiting my blog. 👼🏻👼🏻💖💖🌹🌺🌸
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