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I realise that my attitude to life may be annoying to some people. I always used to be suspicious of people who were happy all the time. They must be overcompensating, surely? Well, to be honest, yes I am.
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As some already know here, I have MS - Multiple Sclerosis. It is a neurodegenerative disease whereby your own immune system attacks the nerves in you brain primarily, but can also affect your spinal cord too. The way I explain it to people is that the insulator (myelin) which coats your wires (nerves) gets damaged, causing short circuits. The symptoms range from extreme tiredness to muscle weakness, pain, twitching muscles, it can affect your eyesight and your sleep.
I don’t suffer as badly as most with the disease. I suffer with tiredness, trouble sleeping and pain, muscle weakness and spasms, and my eyesight regularly goes on the fritz. A common symptom with MS is depression, and I suffer with this too. On occasion I have trouble walking and I am unable to go out to work. I have had MS since 1999 and the last time I worked was over ten years ago.
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The thing with multiple sclerosis is if you allow it to rule your life and get you down, it will drag you down quickly. When I was first diagnosed I felt like the world dropped from under me and I went downhill fast, unable to even get out of bed or walk. It took me a few years and a mental adjustment to literally get back on my feet. Throughout that period my marriage broke down and I divorced.
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Since then I have tried to focus on the positives in my life. I met the love of my life thirteen years ago and we have two beautiful children together. Although I can’t go out to work, I do get to spend an enormous amount of time with my family, and I see that as a blessing. As an aside, I also get to spend many hours every day on Steem and Discord, growing my network and account. The friends I lost during the first phase of my illness - yes, people are like that - are history and have been replaced by the best friends I could ever have hoped to meet.
When I am in pain, exhausted and my eyesight isn’t working properly, all it takes is a hug from my five year old daughter to perk me up. She has an uncanny ability to just know when I need a hug. Life is good and it could be so much worse. I have met people with MS who are confined to a wheelchair or are bedridden. Thankfully, I am not in their situation. If my arm one morning doesn’t function, I don’t sweat it. It will eventually return to scheduled programming. If one day I cannot walk, I look forward to the next time I can take my kids to the park with the dog. There is always a silver lining.
I don’t let things worry me nowadays. Unfortunately this bothers some people, my girlfriend included. But I have to keep a positive mental attitude, or I will sink into a deep depression making my health so much worse. And that’s no good for anybody.
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I have made Steem my second home and treasure the true friendships I have formed both on here and in the various Discord communities I frequent. Annoying chirpy GMuxx is here to stay, assisting with growing the community, helping newbies where I can and encouraging awesome content through my various curation efforts. It really does help me to help you.
