I found out on Nov 16 2017 after 2 days of calls to MCFD (Ministry of Children in BC)/CPS that they had given my 9 1/2yo daughter to a new family in Victoria BC, rather then give her back to me and her brothers. MCFD is hopeful she might forget about us after alienating her for the past 7 months...
I have countless certificates, letters of support from various groups, my therapist (who wouldn't need a therapist after this?), as well as parenting groups, and women's support groups I have attended, all from the past 2-4 yrs. I know the mistakes I made then, and I can tell you that staying in an abusive relationship isnt a good thing at all....I know many of you out here can understand what that feels like. You stay because you want to keep your kids happy, or financially you are doing well (my situation) and where would you go if you left, who would want a single mom with 3 kids....rentals are hard to find, our lifestyle was nice and how can I keep my kids in all these expensive activities if I am alone, I am afraid he will just come find us and hurt me, or bring us back......EXCUSES!!! EXCUSES......Im sure I could find more, but you get the point. I should have packed up my truck and drove..... Today, 5 years later, I try and not carry these regrets, its hard....instead I live with strength and the awarity of the choices I make are mine....I thought I was making smart choices for my kids then, I was blind, I would do anything for them, and staying with an addict bi-polar abusive man was one bad choice I can hold as my own. I know I didnt even love him, in fact I think I hated him, It was convenient.....I will never do that again, and if your reading this, and finding yourself in a similar situation.....PACK YOUR VEHICLE AND LEAVE NOW....JUST GO! There are so many resources out there that CAN help, and Im not talking about calling CPS up and asking, in fact that is a very bad idea....NEVER call MCFD/CPS and ask for anything! If you need help, there are plenty of other private resources, and groups that wont take your child.
I am paying the ultimate price, my daughters life for my mistakes THEN (no current justifiable reason TODAY to keep her).....I never did drugs, dont drink much, and wasnt raised in an abusive drug/alcoholic home. I am smart, had a business, didnt have a criminal record, and have never had an abusive relationship in my life, this was my first. We do things for our partner that are wrong when we are afraid to leave, or when we feel threatened.....unfortunately the govt doesnt care that you are feeling threatened and that you might have done something you shouldn't have, they just want someone to pay, take the blame, like me I paid the price...I lost everything, but you can get "things" back I know that.....YOUR CHILDREN HOWEVER, ARE PRICELESS!
Today years later....I no longer have my daughter, I have my son, thankfully. This is not over....I will not stop fighting to find her, and to let these new people know that I am not an incompetent incapable person, I should have had her back by now....and these people should know that its right for her to have a relationship with me, if they ever saw this, or read this, or somehow found me online (which has become very public on fb @ https://www.facebook.com/mcfdlegalkidnapped) they might see how much I love my girl, and that GOOD family is important to keep together. If it were me, and I adopted a child, I would want to know where this child came from, especially if she was 9 and had all these pictures, and videos and smiles in her photos with this family....I would want to know what happened...and I would research, but thats just me...I sure wouldnt pretend we didnt exist....and I wouldnt lie to her, and hold back gifts....When you start lying you start a very long hard road....and one day she will know they are holding her family's gifts, and lying, and she will hate what they have done .....If I had a chance to meet them, I would just want to get along, for her sake....and try and find a solution without involving MCFD anymore....that would be my hope. Obviously my hope would be to have her home where she belongs.....but that seems a little unattainable right now....so for today I would hope for access, hugs, and to know she is safe :) baby steps.....
This was my first video....PLEASE SHARE
As well as my second video....PLEASE SHARE
I am more then accountable for my mistakes, and have come a long way in over 4 years...I love my family, I am far from perfect, but I have fun, work , rake the yard....take my dog out, and smile, although I can say that each day, each morning, i say good morning I love you to my daughter....and each nite before I go to sleep, i say goodnite, I love you.....I hold her close. I got my kids names tattooed on me a few months ago. and as you can see by the pictures, I carry them with me every single day. the blue butterfly signifies "a wish, luck" the purple rose is our favorite color, and the dragonfly means "new beginnings" . I designed this and it means alot.! PLEASE SHARE....THANK YOU 20180321_132614.jpg
