avoidance

I have for a while now avoided looking at steemit. After all if I don't load it and don't write in here (as promised completely honest) then maybe I don't have the issues I'm suffering? An internet version of burying my head in the sand. If I don't write about it then it doesn't exist... Right??? Yeah not exactly working on convincing anyone let alone myself.
I haven't been well and I've been lying to myself. The back problems I have are getting worse and taking longer and longer to heal. The rest I am meant to have to heal whilst being extremely impractical is being put aside for the reason of "I have to do it". No help because I don't ask. So I started coming out of sorts. Telling friends whom I trust that hey I really am not well. The response has been one of slight frustration that I have hidden this from them and another of what can they do to help. This response has left me feeling distressed. Partly because of whom I thought I would get help from are the ones who do little more than listen. I really don't know where to turn anymore even though I have friends willing to help.
Screw chronic issues...

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