I am not sure if this happens to every one but if you have ever loved some one then i you will get this one.
Once upon a time i decided to accept someone in my life just for try outs with an aim of not feeling alone though i knew that there were different ways of dealing with this.
It used to be part of our locker room banter (imagining who that guy will be as in physique, color,character and more) until the time had come to choose who it was amongst the many that had "applied"
Under the influences of peer pressure, excitement,feelings and fairly tales about how love relationships can be interesting, i decided to try this one before it was getting late for me to experience certain things as they used to say.
I think i made the wrong choice of the one i called my partner that time. There were so many conditions to meet, in other words the relationship was becoming too demanding for me to handle.
I made a lot of mistakes trying to please him and keep him around me for fear of not having some one in my life who some how cares than most did.
As i was growing up, seeing my parents fight all the time and having no time to get to know their children, i had to start looking for love else where. I just needed to feel loved and cared for.
But whatever i was looking for was not in that guy. It just could not satisfy me either. I wanted more but at no conditions and no cost of having to offer something in return. Since i could not find it satisfying, i quit and this below is how that happened.
It was a Friday evening, after a serious misunderstanding with him, when some one invited me for prayers over the night. I felt like i should really go because it was at that moment when i needed someone to tell what i was going through and how to handle certain situations in relationships.
I finally made up my mind to go and this is was the beginning of something sweet and new in my life. The most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me if i may because i encountered God in the rarest of places and my whole life turned around.
I found that peace,joy,care,attention,direction,answers and all that i had always longed for. There is that emptiness in life that only God can fill,only he can satisfy us to the bream,he is the one who can love us unconditionally and he does all things for love.
Signs were already clear to me that it was the wrong relationship with that guy but for fear of being alone i resisted. Now God had proved me wrong about his love through the prophetic and the people he used to talk to me fro that day. Things became clear to me that i had to get back to being single again until the right comes but it was not really easy moving on.
Despite the challenges i experienced in that one year,i could not just shake off everything like nothing happened. It was hard learning to be single again with no hands to hold,no outing to catch,no dates to go for,all things had gone and i just had to look to God. Meanwhile the guy had already moved on as i was nursing my wounded heart.
As they say that time heals all wounds,finally it was moment. I had accepted all things to now function in the will of God and i was and am still in a love relationship with him ever since.
He loves. Yes he loves me. He has comforted me,he has satisfied my heart and hunger. He has sustained my life and all I've ever wanted i found and I've got in him. In this love relationship is where my strength,confidence,life,hope and my all is. I've come from far but my faith will keep me walking with heads up.
Thanks for reading.
