If an attitude given by the Preclear “reads” on the E-meter, the Auditor sets about “running” Dianetics on it.

Having asked the Preclear to locate an incident of the given attitude, the Auditor directs the Preclear to “move to the beginning of the incident,” and then go through it. When the E-meter shows that enough “charge” has been released from the incident, the Preclear is directed to find an “earlier similar incident.” In theory the Preclear will at first give conscious moments of this attitude (called “Locks”). Then he will usually run into an Engram. The Auditor asks for earlier and earlier incidents, and the Preclear almost invariably goes into “past lives.” When the earliest Engram is found and relieved, the Preclear is supposed to have a realization (“cognition”) about its effect upon him, “Very Good Indicators” (VGIs), which is to say a grin, and a “floating needle.” From then on, the Preclear should be free from the effects of the Engram chain.⁶

The whole drug list is treated painstakingly in this way. Going through every attitude, emotion, sensation and pain associated with each drug. Then the drug list is checked on the E-meter until nothing on it “reads” any more. I remember Victory-V cough sweets being a persistent “item” on my drug list. I spent hours trying to think of some attitude, emotion, sensation or pain associated with Victory-Vs.

I was disappointed with my Dianetic auditing, because I did not experience any real change. My back-ache and my near-sightedness remained. A few times, inexplicably powerful images of what seemed to be “past lives” rushed into mind. At one point, I had the very vivid sensation of being burned at the stake. But for the most part I could not quite believe it. Not because I doubted Dianetics, but because I felt that I was not yet capable of fully contacting my past.

After the Dianetics Course, I did several Scientology Auditor courses. As well as receiving Dianetic auditing, the Preclear was meant to go through eight “Release Grades” before doing the “Clearing Course,” and then the mysterious “Operating Thetan” levels. As a Scientology Auditor, I learned how to audit the first three of these “Release Grades.” These were meant to deal with memory, communication and problems.⁷

During this time, I had my first brush with Saint Hill “Ethics.” The “Ethics Officer” would try to resolve disputes, and to remove any obstacles to a resolute practice of Scientology. I had arrived at Saint Hill with the remainder of a small court fine to pay. The papers had been transferred to one office and I had been told to deal with another, so I received a summons for non-payment.

The morning I received the summons I went to the Saint Hill “Ethics Officer,” an intense, overweight Australian, who wore knee-length boots with her disheveled Sea Org uniform. I requested a morning off to attend the court-hearing. She insisted I tell her all the details. I explained that the remainder of the fine was less than £40, and that it was all due to an administrative mix-up. I was amazed when she told me that she was removing me from the course because I was a “criminal.” She insisted that even if a fine were the result of a parking ticket, the offender would be barred from Scientology courses until it was paid.

Saint Hill was very different to the Birmingham Mission where there was an easy-going attitude. The Ethics Officer there would apologize for having to “apply Policy.” At Saint Hill, the Ethics Officers were daunting, overworked and unsmiling. Saint Hill Registrars (salesmen or, more usually, saleswomen) were a little too sugary, and it was obvious that they wanted money. The constant and unavoidable discussions with Sea Org recruiters at Saint Hill were wearing. Virtually everyone there was too busy trying to save the world to create any genuine friendships.

The advantages of “going Clear” still loomed large for me. I did not think of leaving Scientology, just going back to the friendlier atmosphere of Birmingham, which I finally decided to do. My decision was accelerated by continuing price rises.

In November 1976, the price of Scientology auditing and training began to rocket. Until then auditing had been £6 an hour (“co-auditing” between students was free). My Dianetics Course had cost £125. Beginning in November 1976, the prices were to go up at the rate of 10 percent a month, allegedly to improve staff pay and conditions⁸I did not object to that goal, but I did object when the prices continued to go up with each new month. The net effect was a yearly price increase of 314%. The price rises were to continue for the next four years.

1.Hubbard,Scientology 08, first edition, p.7.

2.Hubbard Standard Dianetics Course packs A and B.

3.Hubbard, Technical Bulletins, vol.12, first edition, p.322.

4.BTB “Preclear Assessment Sheet”, 24 April 1969R, revised and reissued 8 September 1974; HCOB “Health Form, Use of - A Brief Description of Auditing”, 19 May 1969.

5.BTB “Drills for Auditors - Dianetic Drills”, 9 October 1971R, revised 28 March 1974; HCOB “Drug Handling”, 15 July 1971; HCOB “Drug and Alcohol Cases Prior Assessing”, 19 May 1969.

6.HCOB “The Time-Track and Engram Running by Chains Bulletin 1”, 15 May 1963; HCOB “The Time-Track and Engram Running by Chains Bulletin 2”, 8 June 1963; BTB “Auditing CS-1 for Dianetics and Scientology”, 8 January 1971R, revised and reissued 18 June 1974.

7.Hubbard,Scientology 08, pp.136-7.

8.Hubbard, Executive Directive 284 International “The Solution to Inflation”, 16 September 1976.

engrams dianetics