Hello community,
Hot temper is one of those things that a lot of people tty to normalize, but if we are to be honest here, it can be very destructive, so everybody gets angry, that one is very normal, you are human, not a robot, but there is a big difference between getting angry and having zero control over how you express that anger.
Personally, I dont think having a hot temper should be used as an excuse for having bad behavior, saying that is just how I am does not really cut it for me, because seriously if your normal is hurting people, shouting at them, breaking things, or making others feel unsafe, then that is not just personality, that is a problem that needs to be worked on.
The truth is, anger itself is not the issue, It is what you do with it, you can be angry and still choose not to insult someone, you can be upset and still choose not to react violently, but when someone constantly uses their temper to justify their actions then it starts to feel like they are not even trying to be better.
And that is where it becomes dangerous, a person with a hot temper can damage relationships without even realizing it , friends start walking on eggshells around them, partners feel unsafe or unheard, even in workplaces, it creates tension, nobody wants to be around someone who can just explode at any moment, It is really exhausting.
At the same time, I also try to look at it from another angle, some people didn’t just wake up one day and decide to be hot tempered, it can come from how they were raised, what they have experienced, or even things they have gone through that they haven’t properly dealt with, so while it is not an excuse, it can be an explanation.
But even with that, growth is still a personal responsibility.
You can not keep saying this is how I grew up forever, at some point, you have to decide if you want to continue that cycle or break it, because if you know something about you is hurting others and you refuse to work on it, then that is a choice.
Now, when it comes to society, I feel like we don’t really address this issue the way we should, sometimes, we even encourage it, You will hear things like, Ah, that’s just his temper, or You know how she is, and just like that, bad behavior gets normalized.
People should not make excuses for behavior, We need to hold people accountable for what they do, we should do this in a fair way, we should not attack them, we should just make it clear that some behaviors are not acceptable, If someone is always yelling at others the people around them should be able to say that this is not right, they should be able to say this without feeling like they are overreacting.
We also need to help people understand their emotions better, People need to know what makes them angry, what sets them off? If they know this they can start to work on it.
Taking a step back from a situation can help.
Taking a moment to think before reacting can help.
Learning how to talk to others properly can make a difference.
Sometimes people might need to get help from a professional, this is not a thing, we should not think it is bad to get help when we need it, emotional awareness is important, People need to understand their emotions and how to deal with them, we need to encourage people to be more aware of their emotions, Accountability and emotional awareness are important,we really do need to work on these things to make a change.
At the end of the day, having a hot temper is not a life sentence, It is something that can be managed if the person is willing to do the work, but using it as an excuse to hurt others? that’s where the line has to be drawn.
Because no matter how angry you are, people still deserve to be treated with respect.
