There are few things as fresh as new snow or a new year. This morning, halfway into the New Decade, I have both here in this small corner of the world.
I'm strongly desiring to write a book this year. If not write that oft pondered book, at least to write more. That seems simple enough, but it always happens in the quiet of the morning before my mind has an entire day to ferment. The to-do list I made last night before bed, not even twelve hours ago, is already half changed. Some even just out the window. Hey, I'll take it. That means half is still there.
2019, if we are all honest with ourselves, was a bit of a wound-licking year. Even the fresh wounds we all got along the way that last twelve months. For me, it's another hash mark in my log book of decades of decoding wounds and sorting out feelings and trying to overcome bitterness and resentment. Those things really keep you from soaring.
It was also a year of letting go. Of feelings. Of beliefs. Of negative thought patterns. Of fears. Of hate. Of judgment. Of people. Ouch. The people I had to let go last year I will spend this year grieving and forgiving again and again and again. While that seems daunting and undesirable, I know it has to happen. It has made and kept me sick physically and kept my family in sort of a rut. I'm not proud of that, but at least the cat is out of the proverbial bag.
I hope exploring and writing about the forgiveness journey is helpful to you or someone you know. I'm not the first and certainly not the last to have to go through with it, endure it or heal. We all have a story, though. And every story deserves telling. With your words, you never know who might need the encouragement. With prayers, you have no idea what God can do. With the act of forgiving, such a simple act, you can open your life up to a whole new perspective and blessings that would otherwise be blocked. I've read enough books on the subject now to really want to give it a go. Join me please!
In addition to this, the biggest focus for 2020, I have a few other goals. Some more fun. Others ridiculous.
-To complete and improve on hand-stand-push-ups (this requires some gym time)
-To break 18:30 in the 5k (my PR currently at age 34 is 18:49)
-To run a full marathon again (not since my first daughter was born, so March 2012)
-To get back into creative painting (acrylic mostly because oil and kids.......meh)
-To have more fun, adventure more, make some new friends and let my daughters in on more of those fun runs, rock climbing adventures and active things I enjoy
-OBVIOUSLY, the most important is to grow closer to GOD. It's a struggle. But like anything else, there is not time - time must be CARVED OUT. First.
Happy Monday. Hope your day is blessed.
